Women and communication

Armando Teran Jr

9/24/10

English 215

He said/She Said

Directed Free write pg 246

            Deborah Tannen poses an interesting idea pertaining to the issue of communication between men and women. The author claims that men and women are socially different. According to Tannen since men and women are socially differently they misinterpret information during arguments and discussions. Deborah Tannen states the reason that men and women are socially different is due to the influence of social structure in their childhood. I understand the point that Tannen is making in her article. I agree based on experience that men and women do interpret information differently sometimes. The author provides scenarios in the article to prove her point.

            A conflict I experienced with a woman during a private conversation made me realize that Deborah Tannen’s theories about communication are true pertaining to the issue that men and women are socially different. I was talking to the most beautiful girl at school. She complimented me and was flirting with me. She started to talk about issues that I was not interested in and I began not to pay attention. She noticed that I was not paying attention, and she was angry. She responded by saying “why weren’t you paying attention”. I responded by saying “I was giving you silent attention”. (This conflict was made up to elaborate on Tannen’s perspective of communication)

            According to the author Tannen women like men who listen to them and give them attention. If a woman is under the impression that a man is not listening she becomes irate. Men have the tendency not to convey their feeling through words. I think that it is important for men and women to socialize in a way to understand each other. When I speak a woman I will be sure to pay attention.